Friday, December 09, 2005

"Why are the box office revenues getting smaller?" asks one asshat.

Click here.

Finally, all the months and months of petitioning and letter-writing to the mega-producers in Hollywood has paid off. You know, for a while there, I almost thought that the corporate Hollywood machine was too big to listen to the little people in the world, but a big screen version of "CHiPs" is proof positive that...


...wait a minute! I was petitioning Hollywood for more chips with dip, not that fucking Wilmer guy from That 70's Show in yet another in a long line of shit-ass big screen adaptations of television shows that got cancelled for a reason!

I recall ranting about this kind of shit before, Hollywood! Are you that starved for ideas that you need "CHiPs" to be made for the big screen? There are so many talented writers out there with truly original ideas and they are literally starving because they can't get their foot in the door proper. Meanwhile Fez is strapping on a motorcycle helmet and driving on his merry way to felch some hot up-and-coming starlet and chase drug lords along the California highways. Yeah, that's a great concept. They loved it back in the 18th century when the t.v. show was on for all those years before it got cancelled.


Let shit like this stay dead. It had a time and place in history and that time and place are since gone the way of leisure suits and Eric Estrada popularity.

1 comment:


Please forgive us Michael. We know know what we do. Our goals are simple- to entertain and maybe make a little money to scrape by. The Douchebaggery of our hollywood machine was not apparent until you brought it up. Thank you good sir for your straightforward words and please have yourself a nice holiday season full of wacky misadventures.