Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Something About This One Gives Me A Case Of The Warm Fuzzies (One, Two, The!)

Coming to the Sundance Film Festival this year is a little Norwegian horror movie called Dead Snow, and after having had a chance to watch the trailer for it on YouTube, I can honestly say I have a pretty good feeling that this movie is going to be the drop-dead-gorgeous-woman-whose-t-shirt-just-spontaneously-rips-open-to-expose-huge-globous-breasts-that-god-never-intended-to-be-concealed of motion pictures this year. I mean, holy shit, it has zombies, and nazis, and Norwegian women, and zombies, and chainsaws, and a German tagline that beckons people to the multiplex for some foreign cinema gold.

Speaking of the German tagline, if you watch the trailer I just embedded for your viewing pleasure (go ahead and watch it right now; I'll wait), it kicks in at about the 1:30 mark. In German it reads: "Ein, Zwei, Die!" How awesome is that? Oh wait, you don't speak German? I speak it Ein Bisschen (that's German for a little bit), which makes me that much cooler than most people, so I'll translate it into English. In English, that tagline goes, "One, Two, The!" Those Germans, always with the postmodern taglines to their zombie movies.

That kind of reminds me of one of the better episodes of The Simpsons, in which the movie Cape Fear gets spoofed. During a scene that features Sideshow Bob at a hearing to see if he should be paroled for prison this exchange takes place between Bob and a prosecuter...

Prosecutor: What about that tattoo on your chest? Doesn't it say die Bart die?
Sideshow Bob: No, that's German
[unveils tattoo]
Sideshow Bob: for 'The Bart The'.
Parole Board Member: No one who speaks German could be an evil man.

Indeed Parole Board Member, indeed. That's why I think the Nazi zombies in the movie Dead Snow might actually be misunderstood from just watching the trailer. I have a feeling that these Nazi zombies might actually be here to help us.

One, Two, The!

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